A Country where Women Goddesses
are worshiped , it's a shame to see the pathetic condition of how the
women are treated at home and at work place .
If only all women put together, can totally
take on the men: but it's not so. Unless and until someone reveals
their hidden power , they can't do anything on their own! Nothing can come out
of it.
The previous generation that's the early 19th century, women were considered as slaves and they remained just the doormats at their houses, I won't even call as homes-' homes where people live where the heart is. 'Almost all men treated their ladies esp. their spouses as a relief for their mere lust and they had no identities, rather deprived them of their identities lest their talents should come out.
Have not you heard of your parents saying how
their parents lived specifically the ladies of the houses.
When it came to education, the girls were stopped with the mere third form i.e class viii, and men folk a SSLC, later a graduation.
The society had the fear that if women were
given the chance to gain worldly knowledge, they would out wit men.With no
qualification and employment , they totally depened on their spouses and
in-laws. Wives had to ask for money, take permission to visit their parents, relatives
and even to use the money and later account for it. The husbands also gave
their salary to their parents.Fearing divorce the wives kept quiet and the in
-laws had the last laugh by domesticating their daughter-in-laws. Why ,I have heard my own generation
menfolk strictly telling their wives- ladies not to read the newspaper, because
they felt it's safe if their spouses remained ignorant so that they
can shine in the society and can be scottfree by taking advantage of the
ladies' ignorance.
When it came to marriage, the girls were never consulted and it was invariably, a decision taken in unison by the elders of both sides.
The mere fact that the girls would also have
feelings, emotions etc are put behind the burner.I have heard of
relationships out of wedlock and running a parallel family and
sidelining the legitimate spouse etc were taken with a pinch of salt and was
considered as a status symbol.
When it comes to deciding on the
children, women folk have no say and they keep on giving birth or go for
abortion, they do not even have a say in this egoistic male dominated society.
How many women could pursue their hobbies after
marriage? You can count on fingers!
Many designers, artists, artistes,
writers, playwrights ,dancers, photographers, scientists, event
managers, musicians, directors, lawyers,teachers,chefs,lyricists,
poetess' dreams were buried in the sand of matrimony. Given a chance one
can bring them to limelight just with a pat on the back, but who will pat and
bring out their hidden talents?
Women -do they have power? The power to take important decision on their own? Power to purchase major household items?
Power to express her views related to their own
kids' education, career? Power to join the family discussions?
How many husbands consult their spouses with regard to matters of finance, house management? How many have the access to money in normal and emergency cases? How many can be proud of saying that they operate a joint savings bank account?
How many share their saving schemes, planning , purchases etc and make the respective wife equally take responsibilities?
How many notify the changes they have made in
regard to appointing nominees, drafting a will etc?
There are a number of cases where the husband preceded the wife and the wife is kept at dark when it came to his savings, PF, Pension and insurance matters? The whole world won't fall if he has kept his wife well informed as no one can give guarantee for LIFE unless and until it is maintained in a FILE? Life is so unpredictable .
The recent study has come with a surprising fact that more girls run out of home fearing cruelty by husbands, relatives, not ready to marry in relations and high expectations from parents to excel in studies.
As soon as a girl grows up she is seen as a '
wify material'.
Let's take the case of divorces- die worse !A woman bears the brunt of the society and in-laws whereas the husband is let free as if everything is wrong only with the womenfolk. Women do not go for divorce as there is no alternative for them outside marriage unless she has a job, her parents and siblings' support, with or without encumbrance. At times parents force her to stay with the devilish husband fearing the stigma attached to divorcee and she becomes the unwanted and unwelcome member in her own family! She takes it as her destiny as parents fail to bail her out of this artificial wedlock.
She dreads to think of the process of
rebuilding her nest in case of the husband refusing to give her the
maintenance. Even the break up.........is not the same for men and women .
Those days the jewels were given as
an asset and an investment for her emergency years.
....................................................................................................
Now a days, every qualified and educated
lady explores the window of opportunity available at her doorstep.
She can no longer be taken for granted. She becomes the captain of the ship.
She knows the turmoils and tribulations of her ship and can overcome the
rough weather and if necessity comes would not think twice to throw the trouble
shooter out of the ship at the deep sea.!
Marriage is no longer a divine bondage with
strings attached, she knows both to make the string stronger as well snap it at
the right times. For her
marriage is a road with equal responsibility and both need to go together
to keep the cart moving.
Before entering into the married life her ideas
are clear and she goes with full open, clear mind after weighing the pros and
cons of marriage, living together, and of course the break-up. She is game for
all and her clear cut vision, straight thinking, her financial independence and
freedom which she gained on her own stays as a strong back up to take the
bull by its horns. She knows she has to decide between the devil and the deep
sea. The people around her also are aware of her status and try to act smart
but in the long run she only gains.
Though a survey says divorces are more, one
cannot totally blame the woman for it. Her financial independence, her
aptitude, her efficiency and her status at work place might play a pivotal role
in her break up as men cannot stand their wives doing well and
superseding them in the professional life .Nor can they digest the fact that
the fat pay packet their spouses bring home playing a
major role in running the house and the status in the society.
'Life has no fury than the woman
scorned'.
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