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Sunday, September 27, 2009

May rage !!!!

Marriages are made in heaven. Made for each other. And blah... blah…
Marriage was a sacred institution of marriage with a man and woman leading a fun filled, full life.
What about today? The scenario has changed completely.

Olden days, people were getting married at a young age when they do not even know the meaning of marriage. Elders see the boy and girl and match their horoscopes and finally they get married.

Emotional security, obedience, trust, a lot of given and take, mutual understandings were the pillars and a strong base for them running the household.

Parental guidance paved the way for smooth relationship, knowing each other well, their weaknesses and strengths provided a platform for understanding each other well within the family.

Joint family taught them living together, tolerating each other’s presence, patience, deciding in a group, team work, division of labour.

Children considered their elders as role models, so they behaved properly.
They abided by the unanimous decision; the brickbats never saw the light of the day.

With great difficulty the couple had time to spend together; this lack of time bonded their relationship stronger. Many times it was always the weaker sex – the woman yielding to the supposedly stronger sex. But they hardly noticed or had the grudge, went on with their life as fish takes to water.

Coming to present scenario, the young ones are brought up in a nuclear family with either ‘we two-ours two’ or ‘we two ours one’. This concept itself defeats the whole purpose of a family.

Hardly any time for the family or each other, with the invasion of TV and computers in the bedroom, it has become all the more ‘latch –key parents’ or’ kids’. This is quite common with DIG- double income group with kids or no kids. [DIGNK]

Here the kids learn arrogance, non-cooperation, impatience, dis-obedience above all no values for elders, or own parents. They are more concerned with the materialistic values, with disrespect for the society and nature. The quick money gives them the perception that they can get anything quickly!

Lack of role model, friends circle and the society are the factors responsible for their behaviour. One can’t blame them totally; partially it is their parents who fail in their duty of bringing up their child with values.

This attitude is carried over once they become a husband / wife.

Current trend is today marriage, tomorrow divorce. It has become so easy to change partners as they change dresses. The main reason behind is financial independence which drives them to take this step, secondly lack of tolerance between couples.

Though earlier without knowing much about the partner, marriages were surviving, but it is not the case so, coz you know too much about your partner, and familiarity breeds contempt.

The work pressure, equal working hours, the deadline to complete the target, the commuting time swallows most of the time leaving less time for the couple to spend together. The little time goes in catching up sleep and hardly there is any interaction. Where is the marriage taking them upto? They would have found out when they were courting they were much happier.

The social obligation of calling on parents, in-laws, attending functions eat up a lot of time. All they can communicate is thro’ mobile, tracking each other’s whereabouts, fulfilling the gap of conversation.

In the name of space and privacy, they give up living together with their in-laws; end up with less time for each other. Who is responsible?

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