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Saturday, September 6, 2014

Who is behind a successful woman ?

It may be true to say that behind behind every successful man, there is a woman.  But do you know behind every unsuccessful woman there is a man called  husband and   behind every successful woman a resentful husband? 

How many have watched the Amithabh, Jaya Hindi movie Abhimaan?

A man cannot at any cost, tolerate his wife's success in her career. Many  women prefer to go ahead with  their career rather than go for the 'saath pheras'.

Whatever is said and done  you cannot change a  man /husband's attitude.

The age old practice of the husband older to the wife, less educated , and less exposed to the worldly life etc., still continue till today.

Some decades ago, when Annapurna Devi married her father's disciple the great Sitarist  Pandit  Ravi Shankar ,she never would have imagined that she had to choose marital bliss over professional recognition.

Why?

 I quote:  "Panditji (Shankar) was not happy, as I received more appreciation than he did from both the audience and the critics whenever we performed together in the 1950s," the 88-year-old revealed recently.  "And that", she said, "had a negative impact on our marriage. Though he never categorically stopped me from performing in public, he made it clear in several ways that he wasn't happy with the fact that I was drawing more applause.A man cannot swallow criticism and the best way is to bury the opponent's career. No one can outwit the male dominated society in any field. The audience attention took a drastic turn towards her and this made him cut her dreams ruthlessly.''

Ex Prime minister Margaret Thatcher's husband insisted that she cooked  an elaborate meal for him every day.

All are not Chetan Bhagats. Let a woman decide what she wants, do not dictate terms, since both work both have their commitments to their profession.This ego business prevails only in the middle class.Neither the upper class nor the lower class suffer from this.

So many people have overcome . The Pataudis are the best example. Sudha Murthy, Nilekani,  D K Pattammal , Sushma Swaraj, Margaret Alva, Jayanthi Natarajan and some film personalities the adjustments really worked wonders. Adjusting and giving respect to the spouse's feeling is no easy  cake walk.

Each one has to work for it and a lot of give and take is done.  You cannot have the cake and eat it at the right time.

Let's be honest here :)How many of us really wish success to our friends, colleagues, neighbours and relatives? The fear of losing or not getting what one wished comes in the way of our expectation and cannot wish to see others successful or happier than us. Isn't it true  most of the times especially in our younger days?

We should get out of this and not only wish all those people mentioned even one's spouse and relish and be happy with the success. It really brings a smile and happiness around.

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