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Tuesday, July 15, 2014

Dam( old )age

I have heard people grumbling 'the old age' , no one is waiting for this to embrace -it comes automatically and everyone is bound to embrace.
The only question  is how are you going to embrace it- with one hand, two hands or indifferently.
 Eariler one seeing 'sastiapthapoorthi was rare and now even Sadahabhishekam is seen by kids and grand kids. Life expectancy got extendedthanks to the advancement in health care and the life span after retirement has come half of one's office life.
Nuclear family has left less scope for the retired old people to enjoy life or rather contribute to one's family except monetarily. No elderly person is consulted in the son's family matter because it's like trespassing .
One cannot get the same respect as one was getting before retirement, when the time comes one might lose one’s status at home , office and the perks which one  enjoyed and one has to accept the fact that one’s life would be minus all of these. If one cannot sit idle at home ,should think of taking up a job- part time or full time without losing one's status and compromising on self respect. 
At home one should know one’s  priority and  be flexible and not rigid in one's activities. 

One should have planned well  before retiring how one is going to spend the re-tired life without getting the re-tyre in the body!
Either you develop a hobby or immerse yourself in self pity. Do not expect others to come out of their routine to be at your beck and call.
Learn to enjoy life , surroundings, people and contribute something for the society. Whatever one was doing while on job so much into the profession that one   failed to notice the things around  one’s career so post retirement should take one's eyes off the job and look at sides to see around the things that need attention and care.
One has to keep the eyes and ears open to be ready to reach the stage. It also does not mean once you reach 70 you become old. It all depends how far you have cared for your body without abusing when you were young. Many in their early seventies have abused their body and systems to such an extent that sometimes you keep guessing whether they belong to the early eighties. Giving priority to health and diet would be a bonus one gives at old age. Some age gracefully because they know to care for their life and make others also happy while living their life.
I have seen who are reaching nineties hale and hearty , still walking without a support, in eighties thin and strong and could give a chase to the teenagers! 
Some even taking a public transport to office working on a part time basis. See the confidence!  Some even before turning 70 start the age 'crutch' to excuse .It's sheer laziness and not ready to  co operate with others, it's like 'me and mine' first.
Some in spite of their inability are not ready to live with their son ( s) due to 
false prestige because having lived with full freedom, cannot imagine someone taking the call. The ego is hurt and here the life is like  a hell. One cannot digest the fact that at that stage one badly needs to be attended to.
At the same time many in their seventies are living a peaceful life helping and caring for each other, attending social functions, spiritual gatherings, going on a pilgrimage... bindaas.... they are the true ones who have planned well and live their life their way. For many their life should be an eye opener.
Women folk do not have rather that's what I feel and  have seen, inspite of old age catching up on them quicker than the men folk- due to hard work, childbirth, multi tasking etc.,  are game for anything and are quite understanding and accommodative in adjusting to situations. The men folk will neither adjust nor allow their spouses to do so. 

 For some one cannot guess the age looking at their face or the body. Hats off to them , they care and have understood that health is wealth nowadays. With the spiraling medical expenses , the children's busy profession and the demanding society, do not allow one to  to have attention seeking syndrome.
 A majority of people whom I have seen plan well and keep themselves occupied otherwise imagine the life of the spouses, the others breathing thro' the neck 24 x7- 365 .
Either you keep a lot of savings to take enough care of you or you have people who would at the cost of their family take a good care of you. You cannot have both. The time has come for even old people to be self sufficient and self reliant. 'Akele hum and akele tum' husband for wife and wife for husband.
Sons, Daughters -in -law, grand kids cannot be hovering around one in old age. Each and every one who feels old age is taking on his or her should think of those who are around them and be co operative and lead normal life.
Try in all possible ways to be helpful at least take care of oneself, one's needs and whatever can be done independently can do and relieve others of tension. Total dependence for want of nothing when one's all senses are normal and in a position to move around is uncalled for. 
Developing a hobby, enrolling in a library , talking to people, doing exercise, reading spiritual matters, or of interests, helping people at home ... small gestures lie this would not only give happiness also refresh one's mind. Happiness can be spread anywhere and everywhere. 
Old age is never a curse- it's a time where one can chalk out a programme from the busy life led so far to  lead a relaxing peaceful  happy life .

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