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Thursday, November 3, 2011

Proverbs bring humor to life.... [ from the TOI ]




Recently I read an article by George N Netto, [  I like his posts ] on "Pranks with proverbs."  here's the link .


I would like to  reproduce only the proverbs which made me smile


Wedlock is a padlock - one of the keys to which is divorce. 

It takes two to tango - and three to create an eternal triangle. 

Variety is the spice of life - ask any monogamous male.

Marriages are made in heaven - and unmade on earth. 

Familiarity breeds contempt - usually after marriage.


Food and drink:

The proof of the pudding is in the eating - and the licking of one's fingers. 

Too many cooks spoil the broth - but speed up the meal. 

When the wine is in, the wit is out - and also some zealously guarded secrets.

Work-related:

To wit, no man can serve two masters - unless both are generous paymasters. 

When there's a will there's a way - especially if it's the boss's will. 

Nothing is impossible - so long as you don't have to do it yourself.


Perky endings :

Barking dogs seldom bite - others, you being an exception. 

A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush - provided it's not a homing pigeon.

Birds of a feather flock together - especially when they have a common grouse.

 spruced-up sayings :

Travel broadens the mind - and lightens the purse. 

You're never too old to learn - something stupid. 

Time is a great healer - as well as a speedster. 

Cheats never prosper - but they do get rich fast. 

Dead men tell no tales - only their biographers do.

Death is a great leveller - though life is seldom a level playground. 

Empty vessels make the most sound - and are promptly heard. 

When all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail - especially your fingertips. 

Honesty is the best policy - where others are concerned. 

Necessity is the mother of invention - when you need a watertight alibi. 

Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned - or a teenager denied a mobile phone.

pepped-up proverbs:

Necessity knows no law - especially when you're being chased by a rabid dog. 

Opportunity never knocks twice - but temptation bangs on the door repeatedly. 

Seeing is believing - especially when you catch your girlfriend with your best friend. 

Never put off till tomorrow what you can do today - unless you're contemplating murder. 

Old habits die hard - when it comes to eavesdropping on your neighbours' tiffs. 

All good things must come to an end - while bad things seldom seem to end.

What goes up must come down - the exception being ever spiralling prices. 

Silence is golden - especially when you're holding forth. 

A rolling stone gathers no moss - but it gets to see places. 

Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery - especially if you're being aped.

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